This week we are talking about talking to parents! This is part of your job that you probably didn't get much training in school. Yet, parents these days can have a lot of control in how your year goes... sad, but true.
In a low-income, rural, Title I school, we have our own set of issues to deal with when it comes to parent conferences. First of all, many of our parents view school as a place where they were picked on or unpopular, so they aren't comfortable coming to the school. Maybe they got in trouble in school and they lack the confidence it takes to talk to teachers... many different situations can play into it but school is often not a place that our parents feel comfortable. Secondly, education is not viewed as a priority with many low income families, in fact it might even be frowned upon. Getting an education means leaving the family for college and a career, they may never return to the small town.
So, when it comes to talking with parents who live in poverty, things may be a little different than talking to urban area or private school parents.
Here are my tips to avoid mistakes when talking to parents.
1. Scheduling the conference: Don't be caught off-guard! When you send the note to schedule the conference, ask parents to respond with any concerns or questions that they may have. This will give you time to observe the student more closely in that area, seek advice from another teacher/administrator, or research the topic. I will be sending out a freebie form for this to my TpT followers later in the week, so be sure to follow my store!
*Remember that if parents are divorced and have split custody, you have to invite both of them even if you have to make a call or send a separate note.
2. Before the conference: Think about the physical aspects of where you will have your meeting. Sure you like sitting in that big teacher chair behind the desk whenever there's a free second... but at your parent conference do you really want to appear to be the BOSS? I prefer sitting at the reading table, often in the kids seats with the parents instead of behind the table. I'm trying to establish that we are in this together, we will create a teamwork approach to meeting the child's needs.
*You may choose to provide pens and paper so that parents can make notes of what you are telling them.
**Hang a sign on the door "Conference in Progress" so that you aren't interrupted unnecessarily.
3. During the conference: Don't talk down to parents, especially if they are from a low income background. The vocabulary we use when talking with our teaching peers is not suitable for our parent meetings. This will really make our parents feel uncomfortable and it will accomplish NOTHING! Unfortunately, there are some words and acronyms that we can't avoid when talking about data and learning disabilities. However, we can explain these without sounding condescending. Parents will appreciate a teacher who talks like a "normal person."
4. During the conference: Sandwich your comments: Positive, Problem, Positive.
Always start out with a positive comment, think about the student's strengths, hobbies, or interests.
Stick to the facts when addressing a problem, don't use similes or metaphors... telling a parent that "the lights are on but no one's home" will not sit well and will only wreck any effort for collaboration. Pay attention to parent reactions and demeanor as you address problems. You may find the need to pause a minute, take the conversation elsewhere and come back to it. However, you will have to address problems without sugar-coating if you want to get real solutions.
End the conference with another positive comment (He is determined/ She is a hard worker/ I know he will try/ I have confidence she will do her best to meet this goal.)
5. After the conference: Follow up with notes (or other form of communication) to let parents know about changes/lack of changes that you are noticing. Progress monitor skills of concern every 2-3 weeks and send data to parents in an understandable format. Send home materials for parents to use at home to help build skills. If they don't hear anything from you, they will assume all is well and may be surprised at the end of the year to find out their child is still struggling.
*Meet with parents of academically struggling students every 9-12 weeks. Send notes about progress every 2-3 weeks.
**Meet with parents of students with behavior issues every 3-4 weeks. Send notes daily about progress (good day/tough day... with a few details).
ABOVE ALL, just make sure they are comfortable, that you are on their level at all times, and that you praise any efforts that they make at home to help further their child's education. It is hard to get some parents with low income backgrounds into the school for a meeting, try to be the teacher who changes the way they look at education and schools.
ABOVE ALL, just make sure they are comfortable, that you are on their level at all times, and that you praise any efforts that they make at home to help further their child's education. It is hard to get some parents with low income backgrounds into the school for a meeting, try to be the teacher who changes the way they look at education and schools.
Next week we will be talking about first week plans.
Read the past posts in this series:
Check out what other bloggers are sharing about talking to parents:
Nice post, I like the sandwich you mention of positive, problem, positive. Very nice!
ReplyDelete